...could you come sit next to me tonight...

God could you come sit down next to me tonight? Just for a few moments. Sometimes I wonder if I am doing my best…if I am doing what is asked of me…if I am worthy. I woke up this morning, left a few messages for those who have given me their friendship, went to work, and, damn it, I fought hard. I came home, jumped into a long sleeve shirt and some running shorts, pounded pavement, and, yet, I feel I accomplished nothing today. Strongly, I know, deep down in my gut, life is what we make of it. But today, today, I don't know…I just don't know. Everything from leaving my career and going back to school, to prospect of letting my heart loose into her arms, to making those I love know I love them dearly, I guess tonight in this room with the fan spinning and the faint light of Houston coming through the sliding glass door I just feel a little lost. I hate admitting it, but I cannot hide from the truth. Moreover, I believe we all should embrace the truth no matter how painful, no matter how frightening. So right now, I will hold my fears, loneliness, and apprehension close to my soul. I will own them. I will reflect upon them, because they are all part of me, part of my life, part of my choices. God, when it is my time, please come and sit next to me. You don't have to say anything…just come and sit next to me for a while.